My cousin recommended this book and my brother got it for my off my Amazon Wishlist. And I finished it today. It’s very good. Consisting of advice and explanations human behavior referencing anecdotal stories of many, many couples from the authors’ seminars and professional practice. Roughly, 10 exercises or sentence structures are distributed where appropriate. These facilitate interpersonal communication and provide a structure to face confrontation of sensitive subjects.
Most differences center around Male, logical thinking, giving energy and Female, feeling thinking, receiving energy. One person must be one energy and the other must be the opposite energy regardless of gender. This applies to the relationship and then again to aspects of the relationship. Individuals who choose to enlist both energies are Narcissistic and will not form long term relationships, which is obviously the reader’s purpose.
My own description, to my surprise, is that I am Male energy. With the caveat that I was raised by women. This is similar to being raised by wolves, but less furry and dinner isn’t raw.
Good Quotes:
Another anatomical indicator that modifies and shapes our choices i the lobes of the brain. The left lobe is the thinking, verbal, and actively “masculine” lobe, and the right one is the feeling, nonverbal, receptively “feminine” lobe. Between these is a fibrous mass called the corpus callosum that processes information from both lobes. Because this transmitting tissue is small in right-handed men than it is in left-handed men or in women, generally right-handed men act from either their left lobe (teaching, verbalizing, problem-solving, solution-giving) or their right love (sensuous, nonverbal, sexual), but rarely from both right and left lobes at the same time.
However, a woman, because her corpus callosum is larger, is capable of processing data both from her right and left lobes at the same time, in effect melding her thoughts and feelings. This can cause problems ina relationship between a woman and a right-handed man, when she expects him to be able to speak freely about feelings and he expects her to be logical. Often, a right-handed man is confused about his bright, sensitive woman and says, “How can anyone be so smart and so dumb at the same time?”
A masculine-energy person will say, “I want to go to Alaska for our vacation. I think that will be a great place. How do you feel about that?”
The feminine-energy person will respond, “That would make me very happy. What a great idea.” Or, “That doesn’t make me very happy. I don’t want to go so far away. I’d really feel better about someplace closer. What do you think about that?”
The “male” energy is the giving, initiating, leading, active partner, who elicits surrender, receptivity, and bonding from his partner. When the masculine energy gives, protects, and cherishes, he is penetrating the other’s defenses to surrender to the pleasure of the relationship.
Femaleness is the passive, the receptive, the emotional; it can be represented by the nonverbal energy. Its function in traditional terms is to server as ans outlet for emotion and as a moral brake; it can be seen as the stable center that allows a relationship to develop and be maintained.